so, we're flying out to Austria tomorrow...and it seems like there are way too many plane-crash stories coming to my attention. Sunday I walked into the living room and got caught up in the beginning of Final Destination, which Carla had just switched to on the TV. If you know the movie it has one of the most intense scenes I have ever seen. It's just very freaggin' scary. In the beginning of the movie, the main character has a preminition/dream that the plane he is sitting on is going to crash...he basically lives the moment....thinks it's real..every detail...until he wakes up and finds himself sitting on the plane (still on the run-way). So, he panics and gets off, drags a couple of pissed-off people with him, and then the plane really explodes, only a moment after it takes off.
Then, yesterday... I hear this story on the news...of this girl in Coney Island who just didn't feel well being in the plane, made the pilot land, got off and then watched it crash. (I'm not sure if she watched it crash...but the point is ...the damn thing went down and everyone died).
http://www.nydailynews.com/front/story/312535p-267388c.html
WHY? Why do I have to hear sh*t like this a day before I'm supposed to step on a plane, which I already hate by default. In addition to this all, I would never be the person who actually gets off the plane because I have a bad dream or I am scared it might crash. If I did that I'd never fly home again. I'm way too rational for that.
Anyway, in case I die, ... well...that would suck....cause my whole little family is with me...so I can't even write a quick will or anything. Which reminds me, I did by the Willmaker Pro (software to write your own will)...I should get that done sometime soon.... this is what you have to do when you have kids.
ok. enough about the scary stuff. I will now move on to "repression"-mode.
Tuesday, May 24, 2005
stress relief realization
There's one thing I've come to realize.... my best stress buster is to care less. Now, this is difficult, for you don't want to become someone who just doesn't care, so I should probably be more specific about this strategy.Care less about the little things. Care less about things said or done to you by others, regardless on how they've affected you personally (i.e. how much stress something would usually cause you). See the big picture. How does something relate to the big picture? Does it make sense to let something emotionally upset you if it isn't relevant to what is really important. If you can "let it go" let it go as quickly as you can. It's wasted energy to stress about something that has already happened. Just modify future behavior.Now, I should probably say that my realization of this stress relief strategy doesn't mean I can just pull it off like that. It takes constant self-reminding and inner peace doesn't just happen from one day to the other. But I did notice how well it works when I actually am able to apply this kind of trouble tackling. The tension just fades away and I refocus on what is more important in my life.
I just noticed...this is basically the essence of that quote I recently found (the serenity prayer?)...Accept the things I cannot change.
I just noticed...this is basically the essence of that quote I recently found (the serenity prayer?)...Accept the things I cannot change.
Wednesday, May 18, 2005
what they found on ebay
so, as I sit here for the 4th night in a row..working late on my class project (-taking an "Advanced Digital Photography & Contemporary Art" class this semester-)...I am watching Jay Leno again for the first time in many many months.
So, now they have this new segment in the show called "What we've found on e-bay" and really this makes me wanna quit my job and try to make a living searching for religious memorbilia (hmm..I'm too lazy to look up how to spell this...the Austrian in me turns around in shame)...
Anyway, so here it is.
A dorito chip shaped like the pope's hat (or dome or whatever you call it...NO, I'm not going to look this up either...you know what I'm talking about)... it was sold for $1,500 DOLLARS!
You think this is bad? ... A piece of toast which looked like someone had scratched a smiley face into it and then claimed it to be some appearance of a runaway bride (who the F is Jennifer Wilbanks??) went for 15,400 US DOLLARS!!!
I don't get this. I reeaaaaally don' t get this. Somebody please explain how this is possible.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=1469&item=5577795202&rd=1
And if that isn't enough, there was someone else who sold a toast with a Jennifer Wilbanks "appearance" a few days before that for $4,000. Ok, let's say you actually believe this is just some sort of appearance...wouldn't you wonder about the authenticity of the second toast going up for auction?
Unbelievable. This country is amazing.
;)
So, now they have this new segment in the show called "What we've found on e-bay" and really this makes me wanna quit my job and try to make a living searching for religious memorbilia (hmm..I'm too lazy to look up how to spell this...the Austrian in me turns around in shame)...
Anyway, so here it is.
A dorito chip shaped like the pope's hat (or dome or whatever you call it...NO, I'm not going to look this up either...you know what I'm talking about)... it was sold for $1,500 DOLLARS!
You think this is bad? ... A piece of toast which looked like someone had scratched a smiley face into it and then claimed it to be some appearance of a runaway bride (who the F is Jennifer Wilbanks??) went for 15,400 US DOLLARS!!!
I don't get this. I reeaaaaally don' t get this. Somebody please explain how this is possible.
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=1469&item=5577795202&rd=1
And if that isn't enough, there was someone else who sold a toast with a Jennifer Wilbanks "appearance" a few days before that for $4,000. Ok, let's say you actually believe this is just some sort of appearance...wouldn't you wonder about the authenticity of the second toast going up for auction?
Unbelievable. This country is amazing.
;)
Monday, May 16, 2005
does this qualify as blasphemy?
Maia playing with available "dolls" at grandma's house. Gotta use what's there, I suppose. So there's Jesus on the cross, some saint which she is making ride the golden horse.....and a few other figurines that work for her just fine. ...Isn't this a bit blasphemic? Well, I thought it was funny, at first...so here is the image..
maia quotes
I've been trying to explain to Maia (who just turned 3 in January) what it means when words "rhyme". Today we actually did some Pre-K excercises and she began arguing with me that 'train' rhymes with 'truck' and certainly NOT 'plane'. I suppose, she meant they are more similar in looks and they both start with "tr".
So I said, "honey, 'truck' doesn't SOUND like 'train', does it? to which she put her ear onto the picture of the truck and said "the truck doesn't SOUND like anything, mommy."
I guess, she won't be getting that concept for a while. ;)
She's really cute nowadays. So many conclusions and statements that are just hilarious, ...mostly because they are so random.
Friends of ours (John and Carla) are staying with us for a few days after having lost their place (sort of). So, this morning Maia comes in the bedroom and proclaims
"Mom, ..... I like Carla a lot. I like Carla and bunny rabbits."
usually she'll tell you she likes horsies, and giraffes (which she insists on pronouncing /girraffiiees/...emphasis on the last 'e'.)
So I said, "honey, 'truck' doesn't SOUND like 'train', does it? to which she put her ear onto the picture of the truck and said "the truck doesn't SOUND like anything, mommy."
I guess, she won't be getting that concept for a while. ;)
She's really cute nowadays. So many conclusions and statements that are just hilarious, ...mostly because they are so random.
Friends of ours (John and Carla) are staying with us for a few days after having lost their place (sort of). So, this morning Maia comes in the bedroom and proclaims
"Mom, ..... I like Carla a lot. I like Carla and bunny rabbits."
usually she'll tell you she likes horsies, and giraffes (which she insists on pronouncing /girraffiiees/...emphasis on the last 'e'.)
Tuesday, May 10, 2005
Veronica Mars
ok. I have to finally admit it (because I need to rant about it). I am addicted to "Veronica Mars" (UPN9, Tuesdays at 9pm...well, not anymore...since tonight was the season finale).
The last episode of the season was really an All My Children meets Scream kinda flick....but I loved it except for the fact that you do not know who comes to her door at 3 o'clock in the morning at the very end of the show. Why would they end it that way? why? why?
arghh.
well, I would like it to be....hmm..Logan, even though I hated that guy 'til almost right to the end.
(this will mean, of course, nothing to all of you who do not know the series....which probably is everyone over 18. ... yes, I am addicted to a teenie show. AND what?! HA? .... but seriously....Veronica Mars is a pretty well written show.)
the end.
I'm out. good night. (the dog slept on my pillow when I was out...have to go change the damn sheets now.)
The last episode of the season was really an All My Children meets Scream kinda flick....but I loved it except for the fact that you do not know who comes to her door at 3 o'clock in the morning at the very end of the show. Why would they end it that way? why? why?
arghh.
well, I would like it to be....hmm..Logan, even though I hated that guy 'til almost right to the end.
(this will mean, of course, nothing to all of you who do not know the series....which probably is everyone over 18. ... yes, I am addicted to a teenie show. AND what?! HA? .... but seriously....Veronica Mars is a pretty well written show.)
the end.
I'm out. good night. (the dog slept on my pillow when I was out...have to go change the damn sheets now.)
Thank God for 'The Breakfast Club'
today I worked from home. bad idea. i got stuck in front of the computer all day. didn't budge except to make coffee and to finally walk the dog around 4pm. my back is killing me. when d got home we decided to take out the girls for a walk. another not too great of an idea. while the trip to the playground wasn't all that bad, the attempt to get food afterwards turned into a nerve-wrenching evening hogger.Dario got the idea to get food at this little Spanish place in the neighborhood we used to live at. In the ghetto, might I add. Probably one of the hottest drug-spots in the area. 183rd Street in the Bronx. But there is a restaurant there which just knocks you off your feet...if you wait long enough for the food, that is.We waited 45 (!) minutes, which seemed like an hour and a half with two small, tired, cranky and hungry children.
"What are they doing in there?", I snapped,"slaughtering the damn cow?"
"You're the one who wanted mashed potatoes", Dario shot back, "and that takes time."
"This is a restaurant. One would assume they have some boiled and ready-to-go potatoes lying around." I added really not trying to have the last word.
When the food finally did arrive, I got to have about a bite and a half until we had reached the kids' utter edge of patience. It was the best bite of mashed potatoes and pepper steak I had in years. Unfortunately, it lay in my stomach like a rock from all the stress I had been eating it with. On the way home, I finally convinced Nayla to shut up (she had been whining continuously for about 20 minutes) by turning up '50-cent' real loud. I'm not sure if she was startled by it or if she enjoyed it but it worked. At home (after the kids were finally put down) I made things all better by watching 'The Breakfast Club' twice in a row (for the 800th time in my life). I can't help it. Everytime I happen to channel-surf and I come across this movie, I get stuck. And tonight, they played it back-to-back, so I got stuck twice.
ok. time to hit the sack.
got a sh**-load of work to do tomorrow.
"What are they doing in there?", I snapped,"slaughtering the damn cow?"
"You're the one who wanted mashed potatoes", Dario shot back, "and that takes time."
"This is a restaurant. One would assume they have some boiled and ready-to-go potatoes lying around." I added really not trying to have the last word.
When the food finally did arrive, I got to have about a bite and a half until we had reached the kids' utter edge of patience. It was the best bite of mashed potatoes and pepper steak I had in years. Unfortunately, it lay in my stomach like a rock from all the stress I had been eating it with. On the way home, I finally convinced Nayla to shut up (she had been whining continuously for about 20 minutes) by turning up '50-cent' real loud. I'm not sure if she was startled by it or if she enjoyed it but it worked. At home (after the kids were finally put down) I made things all better by watching 'The Breakfast Club' twice in a row (for the 800th time in my life). I can't help it. Everytime I happen to channel-surf and I come across this movie, I get stuck. And tonight, they played it back-to-back, so I got stuck twice.
ok. time to hit the sack.
got a sh**-load of work to do tomorrow.
Monday, May 09, 2005
Maia notices people come in different colors
so, this is Maia talking to Petrina ... our black friend/neighbor from upstairs.
(note: Petrina is wearing a tank-top...not running around naked).
Maia: Petrina, your boobies are brown!
P: yes, I know.
M: why are your boobies brown?
P: because I'm brown.
M: my mommy's boobies aren't brown.
P: that's because your mommy isn't brown.
M: .......do you like being brown?
P: yes, I love being brown.
M: and your baby is brown, too.
P: yes, he is.
M: he's so cute.
;)
I feel better now. Last week one of the teacher's at her Pre-school told me that when the semester started Maia didn't want to go into the block room because the block room teacher "has funny hair." (dread-locks) I was so embarrassed, when they told me this. I wanted to say, ..."I swear, I'm not telling that girl anything. She just comes up with stuff. Although, she is addicted to Barbie and that seems to be her standard of non-funny hair at the moment. (SEE, I knew it ...that damn Barbie was gonna come around and bite me in the ass.)" but that would have sounded incriminating, so I just let it be and hoped they would understand that kids will be kids.
(note: Petrina is wearing a tank-top...not running around naked).
Maia: Petrina, your boobies are brown!
P: yes, I know.
M: why are your boobies brown?
P: because I'm brown.
M: my mommy's boobies aren't brown.
P: that's because your mommy isn't brown.
M: .......do you like being brown?
P: yes, I love being brown.
M: and your baby is brown, too.
P: yes, he is.
M: he's so cute.
;)
I feel better now. Last week one of the teacher's at her Pre-school told me that when the semester started Maia didn't want to go into the block room because the block room teacher "has funny hair." (dread-locks) I was so embarrassed, when they told me this. I wanted to say, ..."I swear, I'm not telling that girl anything. She just comes up with stuff. Although, she is addicted to Barbie and that seems to be her standard of non-funny hair at the moment. (SEE, I knew it ...that damn Barbie was gonna come around and bite me in the ass.)" but that would have sounded incriminating, so I just let it be and hoped they would understand that kids will be kids.
Sunday, May 08, 2005
what moms really want for mother's day
i don't know if this makes me a bad mother, but I just wanted mother's day off. I wanted to abandon everything and go pretend I'm 18 without a worry in the world. At 18, of course, I saw things differently. Back then I thought I'm getting my midlife crisis 10 years early. I just didn't know what to do with my life. Anyway, my mother's day morning was already filled with the routine drama of a household with small children ...and the sleeping-in plan didn't work out whatsoever... unless you count sleeping until 7.45 and then being interrupted every twenty minutes while you're trying to get back to REM until finally giving up at 9.15 am. Boy, was I cranky at that point and let me tell you it's no fun when you can't act upon your crankiness, for everyone is trying to be nice to you. But when you have a 3-year old yell "happyyy Mooother's Dayyy" at you every five minutes when all you want is either a chance to go back to sleep or a double-dose of Red Bull things aren't looking to good on the "I'm-going-to-have-a-swell-day" track. It took me until about noon to accept my fate that I will not get the day off, even though I tried to hint at it repeatedly. My brother-in-law called me "not normal" for wanting to spend Mother's Day" by myself. I told him that I firmly believed all mothers secretly would like to use "mother's day" as an excuse to justify time for themselves, right after their family has let them sleep in, and provided a big breakfast to celebrate and appreciate their year-round dedication.
So, the rest of the day was spent according to Maia's plan, which she disclosed to me rather early in my hectic morning. She told me, Mom, I want to go get some banilla ice-cream and then I wanna go ride a pony and go yiiiihaaa and then I wanna go to the park. She didn't even wait for an answer and ignored my comment that this was supposed to be my day, hence the name "mother's day". She just walked into her room, got out a set of clothes and got dressed. When she was done she asked me where her coat was. Mind you I'm still sitting there in my pajamas...quite in awe about her determination and the fact that she just dressed herself entirely when I need to drag her by her ears to get her dressed on an average day.
Since I had nothing better to do and my secret plans seemed to not be working out, I gave in and we went for ice-cream and pony-rides by Orchard Beach.
So, the rest of the day was spent according to Maia's plan, which she disclosed to me rather early in my hectic morning. She told me, Mom, I want to go get some banilla ice-cream and then I wanna go ride a pony and go yiiiihaaa and then I wanna go to the park. She didn't even wait for an answer and ignored my comment that this was supposed to be my day, hence the name "mother's day". She just walked into her room, got out a set of clothes and got dressed. When she was done she asked me where her coat was. Mind you I'm still sitting there in my pajamas...quite in awe about her determination and the fact that she just dressed herself entirely when I need to drag her by her ears to get her dressed on an average day.
Since I had nothing better to do and my secret plans seemed to not be working out, I gave in and we went for ice-cream and pony-rides by Orchard Beach.
Tuesday, May 03, 2005
other bloggers with too much time on their hands
this is quite funny.
read this first:
http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/nyc/57941224.html
and here the follow up:
http://approachingmidnight.blogspot.com/2005/02/apartment-to-share_04.html
After reading some of Daniel's blog (approaching midnight) I have added him to my "favorite blog list"..or wait, I called it "Blogs worth checking" ...see my sidebar links to the right.
read this first:
http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/nyc/57941224.html
and here the follow up:
http://approachingmidnight.blogspot.com/2005/02/apartment-to-share_04.html
After reading some of Daniel's blog (approaching midnight) I have added him to my "favorite blog list"..or wait, I called it "Blogs worth checking" ...see my sidebar links to the right.
Monday, May 02, 2005
mama goes underground
first of all, I have to once again emphasize on how happy I am to live in New York City. It is something about this place that makes it special. I fell in love with this city the first time I set foot here and that was over 10 years ago, as an au-pair, in the middle of a freezing winter-night (in the spur of a moment, we had jumped on a late train from Philly, where we au-paired, to go find and dance at the "Limelight" in New York. Maybe I'll tell that story another time.).
Anyway, tonight I went out to Brooklyn (Dumbo) to join this music jam party/performance combo (ShareDj something event...veeery cool and kinda avant-garde..but easy-digestible kinda avant-garde). I left the house at almost 11 pm, driven by guilt and loyality at the same time. My good old friend Gammon (from Austria) was in town with his band (Thilges3) to play a few gigs. He had told me about this months ago, and I had been looking forward to this just as long. Of course, the night of the first concert came and went. I didn't make it. The night of the second concert (thursday) I was determined to go and planned to abandon all motherly duties at 6.30pm sharp until the moment I received a phonecall from Dario (around that time) informing me of his running late. (ARHGGGH) ...fine, so momma was back on call...I start bathing the kids, get them ready for bed, etc. etc.
Dario finally shows up shortly before 8. Concert starts at 8.30 in SoHo but, I'm no 21 anymore. Me needs layers of make-up and the like, as well as heavy defrizzing action of appearing-zero-gravity hair due to earlier bathroom-moisture-exposure.
Finally leave house (dragging along friend Marta) at 8.30. Return to house at 8.40. Forgot directions. Traffic horrible. Get to SoHo at 9.30. Pay 5 bucks to get in. See last song of Gammon's band performed. ...
Soo, naturally I felt bad. Gammon was a bit disappointed, too... missing both concerts....mhm mhm mhm. I told him, it wasn't my fault but he accepted no excuses for lateness. I told him we'll talk again when he has kids ;) Then we went to the "Pink Pony" somewhere around there to eat and hang with the rest of his musician-friends. Apparently all of them had some kind of fame to them but ignorant as I am nowadays (concerning the music industry) I didn't know any names. One of them used to be the drummer for Iggy Pop... at least, one name I knew ;). Ask me something easy. (who is Jason Timberlake...wait...ehm...Timberland....ok, I guess, never mind...I can't even keep up with in-your-face-all-the-time pop culture).
Anyway, I promised Gammon I'll be there Sunday. Little did I know the Sunday event was set for 10pm in Brooklyn (gasp). I couldn't skip that one. Tired as I was today (got up 7am), I made myself some strong coffee, called everyone I know to please come join me on the long ride as to not fall asleep behind wheel, and finally got my friend Jessie to volunteer. Introduced (?) some more caffeine to system in form of Red Bull (that's why I'm still freaking up and typing, thank you very much) and hit the road. Getting there wasn't too hard; a bit unsettling (creepy but apparently hip neighborhood....well, maybe by day-light) but not too hard; To get into the building of the party we had to type in a code which we got from a voicemail number I copied from the web. It looked like an old (abandoned) ware-house building but once we stepped into the loft where the event was set, we entered a world of high-tech overload. Everyone was sitting or standing around with laptops, synthesizers, musical instruments, video cameras, projectors, and other gear. There were three screens to project the videos, which were being produced by the guests and the room was filled with music which seemed like a jamming session of electronic frequencies...surprisingly pleasing to the groove-nerves... There were maybe 40 or 50 people. I ran into Gammon and he informed me that I, once again, had missed a very cool performance of Thilges3...but, of course, he was happy I came down, regardless.
So, Jessie and I sat down on the floor and listened to the next group, which started just a few minutes after the general jam-session people where having. I quit smoking years ago but I lit a cigarette to puff on (yes, I still like the taste) just because I could. The performing duo was absolutely fantastic.
It was just a woman singing (adding beats and other sounds with her i-book), accompanied by a guy on an e-guitar (or..shit, was it a bass? this is embarrassing... I don't remember...all I know is that he also manipulated the sound of his instrument.... but I was so captured by this woman's beautiful voice, I barely paid attention to the guy. They call themselves "Gustav" ... and they reminded me a little bit of "Portishead".) .... click here to listen a bit
Anyway, so now it's almost 3 o'clock in the morning and I have so much caffeine in my system I could probably break night. I already walked the dog, cleaned the kitchen, got ready for bed... oh well, I guess I'll be surfing the net for a bit more.
so long ma' peeps. ;)
Anyway, tonight I went out to Brooklyn (Dumbo) to join this music jam party/performance combo (ShareDj something event...veeery cool and kinda avant-garde..but easy-digestible kinda avant-garde). I left the house at almost 11 pm, driven by guilt and loyality at the same time. My good old friend Gammon (from Austria) was in town with his band (Thilges3) to play a few gigs. He had told me about this months ago, and I had been looking forward to this just as long. Of course, the night of the first concert came and went. I didn't make it. The night of the second concert (thursday) I was determined to go and planned to abandon all motherly duties at 6.30pm sharp until the moment I received a phonecall from Dario (around that time) informing me of his running late. (ARHGGGH) ...fine, so momma was back on call...I start bathing the kids, get them ready for bed, etc. etc.
Dario finally shows up shortly before 8. Concert starts at 8.30 in SoHo but, I'm no 21 anymore. Me needs layers of make-up and the like, as well as heavy defrizzing action of appearing-zero-gravity hair due to earlier bathroom-moisture-exposure.
Finally leave house (dragging along friend Marta) at 8.30. Return to house at 8.40. Forgot directions. Traffic horrible. Get to SoHo at 9.30. Pay 5 bucks to get in. See last song of Gammon's band performed. ...
Soo, naturally I felt bad. Gammon was a bit disappointed, too... missing both concerts....mhm mhm mhm. I told him, it wasn't my fault but he accepted no excuses for lateness. I told him we'll talk again when he has kids ;) Then we went to the "Pink Pony" somewhere around there to eat and hang with the rest of his musician-friends. Apparently all of them had some kind of fame to them but ignorant as I am nowadays (concerning the music industry) I didn't know any names. One of them used to be the drummer for Iggy Pop... at least, one name I knew ;). Ask me something easy. (who is Jason Timberlake...wait...ehm...Timberland....ok, I guess, never mind...I can't even keep up with in-your-face-all-the-time pop culture).
Anyway, I promised Gammon I'll be there Sunday. Little did I know the Sunday event was set for 10pm in Brooklyn (gasp). I couldn't skip that one. Tired as I was today (got up 7am), I made myself some strong coffee, called everyone I know to please come join me on the long ride as to not fall asleep behind wheel, and finally got my friend Jessie to volunteer. Introduced (?) some more caffeine to system in form of Red Bull (that's why I'm still freaking up and typing, thank you very much) and hit the road. Getting there wasn't too hard; a bit unsettling (creepy but apparently hip neighborhood....well, maybe by day-light) but not too hard; To get into the building of the party we had to type in a code which we got from a voicemail number I copied from the web. It looked like an old (abandoned) ware-house building but once we stepped into the loft where the event was set, we entered a world of high-tech overload. Everyone was sitting or standing around with laptops, synthesizers, musical instruments, video cameras, projectors, and other gear. There were three screens to project the videos, which were being produced by the guests and the room was filled with music which seemed like a jamming session of electronic frequencies...surprisingly pleasing to the groove-nerves... There were maybe 40 or 50 people. I ran into Gammon and he informed me that I, once again, had missed a very cool performance of Thilges3...but, of course, he was happy I came down, regardless.
So, Jessie and I sat down on the floor and listened to the next group, which started just a few minutes after the general jam-session people where having. I quit smoking years ago but I lit a cigarette to puff on (yes, I still like the taste) just because I could. The performing duo was absolutely fantastic.
It was just a woman singing (adding beats and other sounds with her i-book), accompanied by a guy on an e-guitar (or..shit, was it a bass? this is embarrassing... I don't remember...all I know is that he also manipulated the sound of his instrument.... but I was so captured by this woman's beautiful voice, I barely paid attention to the guy. They call themselves "Gustav" ... and they reminded me a little bit of "Portishead".) .... click here to listen a bit
Anyway, so now it's almost 3 o'clock in the morning and I have so much caffeine in my system I could probably break night. I already walked the dog, cleaned the kitchen, got ready for bed... oh well, I guess I'll be surfing the net for a bit more.
so long ma' peeps. ;)
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